Monday, January 30, 2006

The O.C. / To: Elliot, From: Portland

Finally, my world has calmed down post being punched in the face. Kenny, AKA grandpa, and I are going down to Columbia, S.C. and kicking the shit out of that cheesedick bouncer. Then grandpa is going to nail that little bitch that said I grabbed her ass while I tape it for the blog...that is, if grandma is cool with it.

Wow, the O.C., the fuckin O.C. What a joke it has become. Ryan and I have watched it and still do, but Jesus H Bad Storyline, it's gone too far. Get this, Seth (one of the main characters, real life Adam Brody) smoked MARIJUANA and missed his Brown college interview. Doubt that many Califorians want to go to Brown and the whole process of his roast session was borderline retarded. He’s walking down the boardwalk when he runs into the new, bad girl character. She’s smoking what looks like a cigarette, oh wait, it’s not! Seth questions her, blah blah. She offers as her sister (Miesha Barton) shows up. Older sister doesn’t smell anything, nor does she say anything. Cut to Seth in his room with a towel under the door.

Our little sister Kelly said she about cried.

Getting punched in the face was a lot like, well, getting punched in the face. It happened so fast and the blood alcohol level was through the roof, which is probably a good thing, or it might have hurt even more at the time. If anything it made for something to blog about.

Here are a few things learned from taking a shot (as in, someone's fist) to the face:
1. Getting punched in the face ISN'T as cool as you'd think it would be. Yeah it looks cool on TV and shit, but it's not quite the grand time you'd think it is. All you badasses out there know it.
2. South Carolina is for incest, rednecks and general bestiality.
3. Scabs falling off while you eat take-out lo mein is not cool.
4. Teeth are sensitive and worth keeping around. Even tough my white ass would look nice with a diamond grill like the rappers have.
5. People will give you all kinds of shit if your lip is busted up, including, but not limited to: Hey Rocky! What happened to your face? Look out dude, a bouncer. Your face actually looks better.
6. Nothing like the taste of blood while you shower.
7. Yelling at cops is probably always a bad idea and a quick ticket to jail (in most cases).
8. Drunken call logs on the cell phone from the night before tend to get lengthy. Ryan the next day: "Yeah, you called me like three times yelling about how somebody just punched you in the face."
9. Maybe it's time I stop acting like a fool on my birthday.
10. If that bouncer ever comes around, he's going down in a pile of his own puke and blood, maybe even urine, while gramps hits that little liar whore, per grandma’s approval. You can bank on some videos.

Movies that have got some love lately:
Everything is Illuminated — B
Bad News Bears (new) — B-
Jarhead — B+
Waiting — B-
The Aristocrats — B
Walk the Line — A-
Capote — A

If anyone has ever had a DVD burner die on them, hit me up. After 6 months of working great, mine went to hell. Might have had something to do with the subwoofer it was sitting on kicking out nasty bass and messing the "laser" up. A freakin' "laser" beam. Didn't give that little bit of info to the company when their tech support told me it needed to be sent in for repairs.

Here are some tracks off the upcoming Portland tribute to the late, great Elliot Smith. Check out Colin Meloy belting it out. Dig the Dolorean track. This leaked awhile ago and is floating, but I've got something tasty for later in the week, so here's a bit to tide you over. Thanks to for the album artwork, that place rocks the party. Leave a comment if you listen and/or download a track.
Cheers, KM.

The Decemberists — Clementine [mp3]
Dolorean — The Biggest Lie [mp3]
Eric Matthews — Needle in the Hay [mp3]
Sean Croghan — High Times [mp3]

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

WTF Kanye

Oh no, he done it again. As if saying the president "hates" black people wasn't enough, he went and took a picture wearing a crown of thorns. Not very subtle there Mr. West! Oh, we get it, you're JESUS! This is probably going to cause a shitstorm with the Christians and the rest of those kooks that live in the south.

Probably all for publicity and to move Rolling Stone off the shelf. Seems that RS's better years are behind them.

Wow, Kanye's got balls or he's stupid, either or.

AP Story

Punched in the face/Pretty Girls Make Graves

What a birthday. Went to Columbia, S.C. and had a good time watching football (hell yes the Panthers lost!) and enjoying free birthday drinks. Then we went to some swanky, well not really swanky, but lame....very lame yes, place called “Good Company." Let me tell you, it’s not so “Good” and the “Company” can suck it.

We walked to the back of the bar and turned around. Walking the other way when next thing I know, some fratty bouncer punched me in the face. A little hoe-bag of a waitress said that I grabbed her ass, which I didn’t, and this jerk-off goes off and sucker punches me. Always hoped that my first shot to the face would come in S.C. where, yes Dorthy, people are very stupid, are missing teeth and probably sleep with their sisters.

Got back up, yelled in his face and was kicked out. 1 point for Kyle! Cops pulled up, yelling, bad. So, fast-forward two days and you have a bruised lip and plenty of jabs from co-workers.

Can’t do anything legally due to blood alcohol issues and probably never will go back to that hillbilly ass town again. If you go there, boycott “Good Company," hell, throw a brick through their window.

Spurrier and the USC Gamecocks are on my shitlist.

Probably SHOULD have grabbed that girl’s ass since I took a punch for it.

Anyway, here are some cuts from the new Pretty Girls Make Graves “Élan Vita” album. Leak-a-da-leak. Street date of April, but it’s so good you should hear a few songs now. I'll be buying it, so you should too.

Pretty Girls Make Graves — The Noctural House [mp3]
Pretty Girls Make Graves — Pyrite Pedestal [mp3]
Pretty Girls Make Graves — Wildcat [mp3]

Matador PGMG site [link] [link]

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Happy Moonday Kiddos.....

Hope everyone had a nice weekend. My/Our birthday went well. Mere and I went out to dinner with some friends on Friday night to celebrate and then made the obligatory pilmigrage to Goose Island to slam back some brew-dogs. Good times.

Say Hi To Your Mom (nay, Eric Elbogen) has one of the worst band names, ever. Ohh well. Via their website: "Say Hi To Your Mom simultaneously defies and enforces physics. We're the mumbling in your head while you're crunching the numbers. We're the apparitions, ticks, gut wrenching, suspicion and glee too. We're the reason you rolled a nineteen for charisma, the cat's meow, your least favorite aunt. Touch us and we'll touch you....." (more here). I think that about sums up their style. Fans of Her Space Holiday and such bands should dig these tunes...

Dimensions And Verticals
The Forest Scares The Hell Out Of Me
Yeah, I'm In Love With An Android (Beautiful?!?)

Stream ) in your cubicle while you work for the man.

More Chicago music! Hoooray!
The Narrator play punkish-rock-loud music. That is all you can say. Did I mention that they are loud? Not really arranged, but it works.....if you are an angry dwarf back at work this fine monday, this might be a band for you.

The Narrator - Pregnant Boys MP3
The Narrator - All Are Assassins

Friday, January 20, 2006

Birthday tunes!

Well, well, well. Another birthday, another liver-blast fest as Kyle heads to Columbia, S.C. with the tard girl from work (she’s not really THAT bad, but it works better to just rip on her) and her boyfriend. She’s dumb, he’s dumb and who cares. Booze, booze, booze and more booze will be had by all in Spurrierland Sunday.

Work’s been a chaotic mess. People coming, people leaving, egos clashing and attitudes upon attitudes. Clocks ticking on my NC stay…

We’ll be watching the Panthers Sunday, which sucks. Panther mania has swept the Carolinas. Every redneck seems to care now and the millions of those rednecks (with a total of 12 teeth) have chosen Steve Smith as the greatest player ever. Puke, puke, double puke because it should be the Bears. Hopefully Seattle takes care of business. Rumors of Shaun Alexander calling Charlotte home next year since he is tight with Ken “Give me my money” Lucas are surfacing.

Salukis dropped two in a row after inching closer to the top 25. If they would have won those two games, we’d be talking about the nationally ranked Salukis on Monday. Break a brother’s heart. Indiana is coming together and striving in the Big Ten despite injury woes. Want injury issues? Check out the Charlotte Bobcats. Or Shitcats as we refer to them in the newsroom.

Enough yackin. Here are some tunes for the birthday weekend. Tip one for our 24th sometime this weekend.

Cat Power - The Greatest

From Wikipedia: The daughter of divorced parents, Chan (pronounced "Shawn") Marshall was born in Atlanta, but moved to New York City after dropping out of high school, where she began playing shows under the name Cat Power. While opening for Liz Phair in 1994, she met Steve Shelley of Sonic Youth and Tim Foljahn of Two Dollar Guitar, who encouraged her to record, and played on her first two albums, 1995's Dear Sir and 1996's Myra Lee. In 1996 she was signed to Matador Records, and released her third album, What Would the Community Think, which spawned a rare single and music video, "Nude as the News".
In 1998 came Moon Pix, which was recorded in Australia and featured backing musicians Mick Turner and Jim White of the Dirty Three. The album was well-received by critics, and songs such as the luminous "Colors and the Kids," along with the video for the song "Cross Bones Style," helped increase Marshall's profile in the indie rock scene. During the subsequent tours, however, she grew tired of her own material, and two years later released The Covers Record, a collection of cover songs recorded at various sessions in 1998 and 1999. In 2003 she resumed releasing original material with You Are Free, a diverse and critically applauded album which featured guest musicians such as Eddie Vedder, Dave Grohl, and the Dirty Three's Warren Ellis.
The year 2004 saw the release of the critically polarizing DVD Speaking for Trees, which featured a single, nearly 2-hour static shot of Marshall performing in a woodland, and was accompanied by an audio CD containing the 18-minute song "Willie Deadwilder," featuring M. Ward on guitar. A new record, called The Greatest, is scheduled to be released in January, 2006.
Cat Power — The Greatest [mp3]
Cat Power — Could We [mp3]
Cat Power — Living Proof [mp3]

And who could forget Britian's IT band: Arctic Monkeys
Wikipedia: Arctic Monkeys are a four-piece indie rock band from High Green, Sheffield, England. Their debut single, "I Bet You Look Good On the Dancefloor", went straight to number one in the UK Singles Chart. Described as a northern Libertines, their post-punk/dance-punk sound and wry lyrics have also been compared to the The Jam, Pulp and The Streets.
Arctic Monkeys — Bet You Look Good on the Dance Floor [mp3]
Arctic Monkeys — Still Take You Home [mp3]
Arctic Monkeys — When the Sun Goes Down [mp3]

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Bound Stems and I play catch up...

Lots going on in my world that I haven't been able to write about here. Kyle and I share a birthday. It's Sunday. Dental School is still hella lame, the Bulls/Bears/Blackhawks are worthless, and it's cold in the Midwest. That about sums it up.

Speaking of the Bulls, I'm fairly sure none of you watched the Bulls/Knicks game last night, but some a-hole in the stands threw a beer at former Bull Antonio Davis' wife. So god ole' AD runs out into the stands and defends his woman. Snaps for AD. Woulda done the same thing hommie. Eddy Curry made his fat-return to his hometown and almost died on the court. Called it months ago.
AD Fights for his girl

Pitchfork nailed the
Strokes review. The album sucks. Sorry kiddos. Last month I was listening to a Q101 interview with the Strokes and the guys totally blew off the DJ (they were actually pretty rude), so they are on my shitlist for the new year. Dickbacks they are.

Jeffrey Foucault is starting to gain a little "hype" here in the blog world, and I couldn't be happier. Great tunes, that guy.

My old
Shure E2s spunked out again, so the good people at Shure hooked me up with the E3s. Great company, can't reccomend them enough.

For all of you Sopranos fans, check out the local Chicago papers over the next few weeks. The Feds recently nabbed Joey the Clown, reputed mob boss. Dude had serious clout back in the day and was apparently a stone-cold killer. They make movies about guys like this. Crazy.
Feds nab Joey the Clown
Joey Clowns around in court

Tons of Chicago music has been floating around the internet as of late and I'd like to throw another worthy band's hat into the ring of Chi-town supremecy. The Bound stems are made up of four high school friends and one guy who played in Harvey Danger. It's weird pop, think goofy Arcade Fire minus the 42 people on stage. Some people liken them to the Fiery Furnaces, but I just don't see it. Whatever. Pitchfork recenly gave them a desce' review (
EP), and they are Spin's band of the month for Febuaray. Groovy. From their EP The Logic of Building the Body Plan, which I think is a great title, enjoy:

Bound Stems - Crimes and Follies
Bound Stems - My Kingdom for a Trundle Bed

More music here (
They'll be at the empty bottle on Friday. You should go.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Welcome back...Ryno...

Happy new year ladies. Ryan is back to rock your socks. In an attempt to more constructively spend the small amount of time between patients and cancellations that I now have, I've vowed to return to the blog word with a smash. Sorry for the absence. Over the past few weeks, I've been working on this whole doctorate thing. It's complicated. You don't care, so I'll spare you.

The A-Sides' Only Michele has been reaming my iPod lately and they are a band I see myself getting into more this year.

Sidewalk Chalk
Park Avenue
Here or There
Expressway to Your Heart (Soul Survivors cover)

More tommorow.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Screw Carolina!

Freakin Bears. Overachievers? Probably.

Tough game to watch in NC, and it's going to be a long-ass week of hearing shit from some stupid bitch at work who thinks she knows a little something about football. She’s also a Panthers fan.

I blasted a Charlotte columnist this week on his blog feedback tell him all about the Monsters of the Fall-Down-on-Defense. Who’s eating it now Tom Sorrenson? Yes, sir, I am.

Talked up the Bears quite a bit here in the Tar Heel state and their defense called it in. Big props to the Panthers, they had a great game plan and destroyed Lovie's cover 2. Secondary was hurtin for a squirtin, but how in the name of all that is holy Bo Jangles does Steve Smith get THAT wide open. Put Smith on a spy team, he’ll find Osama. Dude can get behind coverage. Fantasy stud for me this year that he was, he’s an Assclown when it gets down to it.

Been listening to Damien Marley/Silver Jews/Madlib lately. Doesn’t take away the pain of the NFC 2 seed getting bounced.

Top 10 this week, with mp3s of shit you probably already have.