Wednesday, November 23, 2005

The Darkness, bitches.


Ah The Darknes...Sure they really don't have much talent (except for the rip-snortin solos the guitarist belts out), but they sure are fun, well kind of fun at least. Here are a few tracks off the new album "One Way Ticket to Hell and Back" so crank it up to 11 and pretend that big hair and coke were still fashionable. The first track "One Way Ticket" starts out with flutes and awes, majestic really, rolls into some cutting sounds, sniffing sound and then bursts into a rift that could only come from THE DARKNESS!

Listening to the falsetto voice of lead singer Justin Hawkins is a guilty pleasure. Is that cowbell I hear? Everything needs more cowbelll. The Darkenss are similar to watching a train wreck, car accident or cows having sex in an open field: You just can't look away. Other songs include the ever enjoyable "Knockers", who don't love some knockers, to the track "Dinner Lady Arms," what the hell does that mean? Just tell me that "One Way Ticket' isn't catchy.

Nice story about Mr. Hawkins:
The Darkness' vocalist Justin Hawkins became an amphibian midwife during an educational visit to the Norfolk Broads. Whilst urinating behind some bushes, a spherical object fell from a leaf and rested on the shaft of his man-member. To his horror, the object wobbled before what appeared to be a frog-like creature with a long tail hatched from within it. The reptile accepted Justin as her mother, and denied the Hawkins' family's attempts to introduce her to the wild. The scaly infant would look at Justin and exclaim "You are the one that I want." Probably because he had 'DELIVERED THE NEWT ON JOHN'.

Enjoy.
The Darkness - One Way Ticket
The Darkness - Knockers
The Darkness - Is It Just Me
The Darkness - Dinner Lady Arms
The Darkness - Seemed Like A Good Idea At The Time

2 Comments:

Blogger c said...

i am only downloading these songs because these guys are such dicks i want to rob them of their livelihood. (even if it is just symbolically).
thanks for the tunes..
peace

3:29 PM  
Blogger Eric said...

Holy shit! The Darkness are back. They sound like AC/DC in the early eighties but with the maturity of 10 year olds. They rock! Awesome story about the amphibian.

4:30 PM  

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